Monday Madness

Did you guys go outside today? Holy fucking shit.

Honesty seems to be today's theme

Girl: So what major are you?
Guy: Douchetology. most people refer to it as Economics.

-johnson, heard by fox


The other one was in her eye

Hotelie [editor's guess]: I missed lecture today because I woke up and I only had one earring in.

-rockefeller, heard by kc


Another frat boy with clarity

Dude-bro: Nah, I'm not going out tonight. I'd rather wake up tomorrow and have a problem set done instead of a fat girl.

-trillium, heard by doug


I share his curiousity

Dude, approaching table of kids and addressing one: Excuse me? Hi, I noticed you put your salad in the microwave and I was just wondering...Why?
Asian kid: Why not?
Dude: Well, it's just, you had two. And you didn't put the other one in...I have to know!

-becker, heard by a'da


Oh man I wish she had heard the rest of this

Girl on the phone: You're gonna go rubbin' your balls all over other girls and i can't even...?

-arts quad, heard by lichka


A loving mom, for sure

Girl: Why would I tell Professor Turner I'm pregnant, I haven't even told my parents yet.

-triphammer rd, heard by bailey

You guys have been doing better, keep em coming!
-the ear