Sunday's Best

First week complete. Good work, chill'uns. Now submit to me! SUBMIT!
overheardatcornell@gmail.com

Word dude, let's try Johnny O's

Broheim: Dude, let's go find some girls, and none of these art freak chicks with colored hair. I mean some real girls.

-stewart ave, heard by the ear


Maximum Coverage

Sorority-Member-to-Be #1: (walks in to #2 getting dressed) OH MY GOD I'm so sorry, don't worry, I didn't see anything.
Sorority-Member-to-Be #2: Haha, it's okay, I don't care, I have a thong on.

-north campus, heard by victoria's true secret


Being an English major, this embarrasses me greatly

*TA divides both sides of an equation by a variable v.*
Senior: Wait a second. Being an English major, I have no idea what you're doing here. Why is the v suddenly on the bottom? Did you just decide to put it there?
TA: Ummm... right.

astronomy 102 section, heard by seriously!


Date Conversation 101

Grad student trying to impress a date: Pigeon shit is the most toxic bird poop.
Date in disbelief: How do you know that?

-stellas, heard by squirrely mcsquirrel


Like, If I kiss him, I could catch it?

Sorostitute: I mean, he has, like, clinical depression. That's like breaking your arm. Its, like, hereditary.

-wsh, heard by dek

enjoi!
-the ear