Sick of the overwhelming stupid smacking you in the ear every day at Cornell University? Send us the hilarious, stupid or just out there things you hear, when and where you heard them, and by who (no names, just generic description) and we'll publish them. Either post it as a comment or send it to Good luck, and happy hearing

Thursday, May 04, 2006

New and improved Thursdays (now with more pep)

Hotelies sometimes flunk culinary class

Girl on cell: Oh my god I LOVE making macaroni and cheese. [pause] Yeah but not shitty macaroni and cheese good macaroni and cheese. [pause] You know the kind that's really good with really good macaroni and really good cheese.

-Outside Uris hall, heard by dne


Sister 1: ...Oh, i thought you meant like you were in his classes.
Sister 2: No, i'm saying like i would classify him as being stuck in the eighties, or nineties.
Sorostitute: I would classify him as a 20 year old stuck in a 60 year old mindset.
Sister 2: I can picture him when he's like, 40 -
Sorostitute: psh i can picture him when he's like 80. UGLY. and FAT. (pauses) and I can't believe I made out with him.
Sister 2: Yea, neither can I.

-Appel commons, heard by Doc

Irony's so easy, Alanis.

Girl on cell: I dont talk on the phone that much

-East Ave, heard by the ear

Wonderbread wunderkinds

Girl 1: You're the coolest thing since sliced bread.
Girl 2: I don't know if I want to be the coolest thing since sliced bread that's a lot to live up to. I mean what's cooler than sliced bread?
Girl 1: [Long Pause] Crustless Bread!

-WSH, heard by dne

Potassium's brain food

Boy on cell (giving exam advice): Eat a banana. Do you have a banana? GO TO THE STORE AND GET A BANANA! Eat a banana and you'll do fine.

-Court, heard by bs

Big Red Broke

Girly Girl: You have 58 and you're bitching??? I have 25!!!

-Ivy Room, heard by allen

6 in one day? Good work kinder. Keep it up
And don't forget to include where you heard it!!!


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