New and improved Thursdays (now with more pep)

Hotelies sometimes flunk culinary class

Girl on cell: Oh my god I LOVE making macaroni and cheese. [pause] Yeah but not shitty macaroni and cheese good macaroni and cheese. [pause] You know the kind that's really good with really good macaroni and really good cheese.

-Outside Uris hall, heard by dne


Wow

Sister 1: ...Oh, i thought you meant like you were in his classes.
Sister 2: No, i'm saying like i would classify him as being stuck in the eighties, or nineties.
Sorostitute: I would classify him as a 20 year old stuck in a 60 year old mindset.
Sister 2: I can picture him when he's like, 40 -
Sorostitute: psh i can picture him when he's like 80. UGLY. and FAT. (pauses) and I can't believe I made out with him.
Sister 2: Yea, neither can I.

-Appel commons, heard by Doc


Irony's so easy, Alanis.

Girl on cell: I dont talk on the phone that much

-East Ave, heard by the ear


Wonderbread wunderkinds

Girl 1: You're the coolest thing since sliced bread.
Girl 2: I don't know if I want to be the coolest thing since sliced bread that's a lot to live up to. I mean what's cooler than sliced bread?
Girl 1: [Long Pause] Crustless Bread!

-WSH, heard by dne


Potassium's brain food

Boy on cell (giving exam advice): Eat a banana. Do you have a banana? GO TO THE STORE AND GET A BANANA! Eat a banana and you'll do fine.

-Court, heard by bs


Big Red Broke

Girly Girl: You have 58 and you're bitching??? I have 25!!!

-Ivy Room, heard by allen

6 in one day? Good work kinder. Keep it up
overheardatcornell@gmail.com
And don't forget to include where you heard it!!!